Tuesday, November 10, 2015


When my draws stop matching I'll know I'm through with you.

EFFORT does not take much. It simply involves thinking about that the other person's needs vs what you think the other person needs.  I thought buying matching draws was just a cute side project I did for myself...I have a movie going in my head nonstop and so I dress accordingly throughout the day...just in case a fire pops up in the 3rd act and a fine fireman must rescue me......you supposed to have on matching draws, right?  That's my effort for my own ego.  Like the male ego may be buying shoes for someone to tell them that's that they need but it's really for his own ego.

That said, the effort in which I speak is someone who is committed to wondering how you feel and how you are doing and servicing YOU not simply their egos.  I don't know about you but I am long tired of negroes thinking their penises are magic wands or saving graces for - colds, hard days at work, rent, etc.... I really would like all said fuck boys to take a long walk off of a short cliff.  Who needs em?  Clear the way for the men who don't think it's corny to rub your feet because you've been clearly standing up all day.  Or get you water because...duh, you're thirsty...you probably forgot to drink something putting out fires.  Or drive for you because you fall asleep after load out.  It's not that deep.  And it costs nothing.

I'm always told I give too much.  But fuck it, I have a lot to give.  I do.  Which is why I attract these Succubus (succubi) who don't so much as offer a cheeseburger... "we could make this tour manager thing BIG", "we could take over the industry"...could WE?  What else could WE do.... these boys and these promises of partnerships and they won't so much as rub your toes after a hard days work because it doesn't feed THEIR ego.  This must be what #Givenofucksforties is all about.  Knowing your needs and literally spitting at anything in the way that goes against them.  Ok, I'm gonna stop spitting at niggas...but it's so good for my movie.

Tuesday, November 3, 2015


As if working wasn’t hard enough.  

Dating, as an adult, is some new shit.  Speaking clearly about intentions and going forward anyway is also new.  Seeing an adult is new.  That’s not to say perfect and people don’t need inspiration here and there, but it’s nice to have an option.  I’m dating.  A man.  Like a grown up.  Who has baggage and trials and tribulations and goals and perfections and shortcomings and needs and fears.  Just like me.  There is no posing.  We just be.  I changed my return flight 3 times.  3 change fees.  What am I crazy?  Nope.  As Cece would say…”trying”.  There are children, and families and blended situations and so much stuff and so much living.  I feel like I’ve been standing still thus far.  And by my instagram account of course I’m always moving.  But my actual living part…engaging….attached.  It was missing… It is missing.  I don’t want to put the cart before the horse…but hard work pays off.  As long as I don’t sabotage myself….as usual, I believe I’m in for a nice ride.

Got me re-readin Bell Hooks up in this piece.