Cote d'Azur

So we're doing this big radio award show - NRJ awards...it's mostly like , I suppose, the MTV Awards. The Peas, Jay-Z, Pharrell. It's happening the same time as Midem and all we can seem to talk about is raising money for Haiti..who by the way, per the french newspaper Le Monde has close to a billion euros in donations. A billion. So they got close to a billion, I'm standing around millionaires, hanging with my girl who I have know from here for 15 years, and my business manager texts me the most heinous shit ever about my finances. So, I'm ready to curl into a ball and start crying...like I'm broke. I'm not going to make it. What the fuck is wrong with me. Blah blah blah. And I talk to my consigliere who reminds me..

"yeah bitch. you are the risk taker. Stop buying into lack and limitation that people are selling. I know there are certain realities but folks' outlook is very negative and they make no effort to finesse that shit. You love France and you job. Enjoy them both. God is soooo good and as long as we are creative and grateful we continue experience love and peace for real. Let the Universe know you have faith by not falling into that trap."

And then my phone died. And I am so grateful for her. I am so grateful to have friends (and a mother) who believes in my crazy ass shit. I'm a coocoo bird. This I know. And I lead by the seat of my pants with no real intention of turning it around. And that's okay. I cannot imagine a life or even having the luxury, of being able to talk shit about what people don't do or need to do or have a bevy of advisors to tell me what to do, all the while not having an original thought in my head. No risk. No risk? What the fuck is the point if you don't take risks in what you do? I so admire actors and singers who balls against the wall will work retail or a restaurant or whatever, fuck it, nothing, in order to pursue what they want in life. Or rather, the fact that they know what they want and actually have an attainable goal. It's so easy to call shots from the sidelines/pedestal - whatever entitled people prefer to call it -- and talk shiiiiiit....OOH the shit talking is amazing. All that learning and knowing and no goals. Fuck not having a goal. Fuck not taking a risk.

In the words of Will.I.Am,

Imma be the upgraded new nigaro
Imma be the average brother with soul
imma be worldwide international
imma be in Rio rockin' Tokyo

Imma be brilliant
with my millions
loan a trillion
and get back a billion